Four Years a Mom

We started a new tradition this year. An additional aspect to the Birthday Celebration; a time to remember and reminisce. For me, I recall about this time 4 years ago when I began experiencing the pangs of labor for the very first time. I began an experience that some have described to be the worse pain a woman could possibly have. My story was unique as is every other mom's, but as we celebrate my first born child's 4th birthday, I am reminded that it is a pivotal time for me too: I am four years a mom!

We had him on the 22nd. I broke out in lavish praise when I heard his first cry. I could hardly take it all in when I first held him in my arms. We brought him home on Christmas day in a red Christmas bootie that he was given as a gift from the hospital. It was such a time of excitement and joy as family and friends flooded our home with their presence and love. Imagine Tidings of Great Joy meshed with the awe of a brand new son!

I celebrate because my entry into motherhood was stark and real; the reality of holding all responsibility for a newborn was no joke. But I have come to realize that first-time motherhood throughout the entire journey is even less of a joke; for no matter how they came in, they encounter that relationship with you afresh every new day. I find that my first born is coaching me constantly, teaching me what is best and what isn't, what works and what doesn't. He's "The Experimental Child," allowing me to test my instincts and ideas so that those afterward enjoy a smoother ride.

So today, I celebrate me. I celebrate making it to having a bright and intriguing pre-schooler; a young man who will be encountering the real world real soon.

We love you, MM! I look forward to being a better mother as we prayerfully parent you, and we know that you will teach your brother and any others along the way how to be exceptional individuals.

With love and gratitude,

-tia.
12/22/13

Inspirations: The Way You Make Me Feel, MJ!

Image courtesy of DrAjao

(Inspired to Praise)

The first time I heard my sons' cries, my response was exactly the same.
I mean, imagine that moment when a person doesn't exist and then the next moment they do, and they proclaim their arrival with a strong, wailing greeting.

Praise exploded from my heart at that moment!
Unrestrained and unrestricted praise.
I couldn't have cared less about the OBs, Nurses, Anesthesiology, Techs and others present
I actually couldn't help myself and I couldn't contain it.
Both were amazing moments.

From their first cries till now, my MJ still compels me to praise. I'm sure you know what I mean.

When we look them over...you know, tilt our heads to the side and look real close at their features...
How likened they are to us and/or our spouses?
Fearful at times at the resemblance?
I look at how wondrously they are made and again I am compelled to praise.
"My God! You are wonderful!"

What about how they surprise us at the intricate details and knowledge
That they soak up moment by moment, without our intervention?
We think 'How could someone so small be so smart?' 
When they say witty things, we wonder how this whole person could have come out from us!:
"I am actually a parent! Who would have thought? Thank You, Jesus!"

And when we look at how they are literally maturing before our eyes,
Becoming more handsome and more beautiful, and think 
'What a perfect blend of genes! LORD, You are amazing!

GOD is worthy of all this praise, for HE designed them specially to bring us joy in life.

So my dear children, my MJ, thank you for inspiring me to praise. 

For inspiring me to praise through my example to you. 

Praise through my love and service to you as your mom; 

Through discipline, as I envision the astute men you will one day be. 

Inspired to draw closer to the Lord so that I can teach you the things of God; 

The pleasures of knowing HIM in your youth, 

In being so near and dear to Him that he orchestrates your plans, 

Giving you opportunities that I didn't have

Praise through my work because all that I am today 

Is because you inspired me to do better,

You are the reason my life has changed today, 

Because you inspired me to get off my butt and get out the door to make something happen!

That's how you make me feel, my MJ,

'Cause as another MJ (2009-2013) said:

Oh I'll Be Workin' From Nine To Five

To Buy You Things To Keep you by my side

Enjoy this track with me as a tribute to the MJ we celebrate today.

I remember where I was this day in 2009, MM still in utero and Jojo only a dream

I'm grateful to have them both as a source of joy today.

I love you, My MJ.

06/25/13

Knowing their Heavenly Father

When my husband proposed, he did so with a dainty white wedding Bible that had a personal inscription to me:

Though the Lord loves you most,

I'll attempt to be the biggest physical representative of that Love.

What a daunting challenge, to love as God loves; to give, to sacrifice, to provide, to protect. Of course it is not humanly possible to exhibit God’s attributes to the perfection that He does, but the mere attempt is bold. And the interesting thing is that this is what we are all called to do for all people.

Particularly for our children.

You know, as parents we have the power to teach our children the attributes of God, our Heavenly Father, and what a challenge it is to show them the height, the depth, the width, the strength of His love through our example. For instance, my son has been demanding my attention a lot lately. It seems like every 5 minutes he’s calling me, trying to get my attention to show me something he wants or beam over an accomplishment. I do my best to answer every time he calls but as you can imagine this can be tiring and annoying, honestly. But if I am to exemplify how attentive God is to his cries; to his needs and desires, I will take time to answer.

II Samuel 22:7: In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into His ears

Could it be that when I answer him and his cries, he can have assurance that the Lord cares and hears him when he prays? By showing him this attribute of a loving parent, I can teach him these truths about God as he grows.

He will learn that a parent loves unconditionally, that a parent protects, that a parent enjoys giving good gifts to his/her children. And as he grows, I can teach him that even when I fall short the Lord will never fail them.

Psalms 27:10: When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up

Of course, this also goes for discipline, in love.

They would know that our love will go to the limit for them and in so knowing, they will realize that God’s love is limitless.

Let’s take steps to consciously exemplify the attributes of God to our children so that they can truly understand His love and will be receptive of Him as adults. In so doing, you are preparing them for an eternity in His love and His divine presence.

Lyrics by tia 2012


Image courtesy of www.DrAjao.com

God Gave Me Three

Three. Three! All for me.

What glorious treasures my eyes can see!

One is Handsome, the second is Cute, the third is more Beautiful than I can believe

All for me.

Gifts from above

A truly awesome expression of His love

Kisses, embraces and coos galore

What a wonderful world of boys to explore

The first showed me love in choosing me

Opening the doors to marriage and motherhood

And so the second came to be

Giving me the joy of life and enriching my existance

And now with the third, I can't contain the elation

It feels wonderful holding a little one in my arms again!

God gave me three, He knows I can bear

The needs of kings and princes

The cause of visionaries and prophets,

The tasks of trendsetters and lords

He's mandated me to serve and love greatness under one ediface

And to stand even through hard times

Oh for the grace to take on the task!

Oh for the patience to endure!

Oh for the strength to be more than a woman

Greater than i've ever been before.

A calling more challenging than i've ever known

Yet He has given and He says I can bear

To watch these three grow into their own

I must be strong and diligent

For I stand on this promise: 'She will rejoice in time to come...'

May I truly be tenacious,

For you my metamorphosing spouse, my terrific toddler and my delightful infant.

God gave me three. All for me.

Lyrics by tia 03/03/12

Also see God Gave me Two and God Gave me mine

Food for Thought

I’m sitting here tonight watching my little boy eat his dinner. I proudly watch as he sits at his little toddler table and chair set feeding himself rice with a plastic spoon. It’s hard to tell if he’s a righty or lefty as he alternates the spoon in his hands. He’s grown so much as a terrific 2-year old.

I sit and watch with a lot of thoughts on my mind. As many other young parents, I get concerned about whether he is eating well enough, if he’s getting proper nutrition and if I’m providing him with enough food options. Many times at meal time I begin to panic, wondering what would be the best choices for him, as they do get rather picky at this age. If there is anything I would spend a fortune on, it would be piece of mind about his food!

As he sits here and ceases eating to start playing with the food, I remember my grandmother particularly who would sit and watch me eat as a little girl in just the same way; well, except that she would have a switch in hand since I would never eat. I remember chewing food reluctantly and many times tearfully as my grandma watched me with scrutiny. Thinking over it now makes me wonder what was going through her mind as well. I can imagine her worry as she sat there, her desperate attempts to make me comply and the many prayers she prayed. Her intent was not to force me to eat meals that I did not enjoy but rather to ensure that I was healthy and grew strong.

“Okay, MM”, I say as I stop him from sprinkling rice through his fingers like sand and making it pour all over the table and floor. He falls to the floor and wails in protest.

Terrific.

Food is meant for nourishment and pleasure; may we and our children always enjoy it!

-Lyrics by tia 2012

We live but once

Special thanks to All is Well-Inspire for sharing the following quote which inspires my post today.

I shall pass through this life but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to my fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again ~ Etienne De Grellet

This quote really hit home for me because I too have been thinking about the fact that we live but once. We’ve got one life to live, one opportunity, and each moment is a chance to focus on something special, something important to us; something fulfilling and that has lasting impact.

Why not spare that extra few minutes to talk to a friend? It doesn’t hurt to pick up the phone to call a relative you haven’t talked to in a long time.

So you have a few dollars in your pocket; why not give it with the opportunity. The impact might be momentary but you will make an impact. Check out The Good 30 Day Challenge.

You have that concept, that idea; are you going to selfishly let it die with you because you don’t see how you will gain from giving it? It is better to sow it and let God take care of the increase. Trust Him.

We have a limited time on earth; each of us have a time to go. Let’s grab hold of the legacy our parents and grand parents have to pass on, lest they leave without sharing all that is on their hearts. I recommend getting a voice recording device and recording special dialogues where you dig deep into their lives and experiences, extracting the richness of your heritage.

Let’s invest in our children. Every moment counts, because each moment that ticks away inches them closer to adulthood and it is what we do this moment that will impact their destinies.

We live but once; let’s make the most of the life we've been given, and may He say "Well Done" on that faithful day.

Lyrics by tia 2011

The Value of Life

I've been thinking a lot lately about what is important in life.

Turns out that many things that were so important years ago won’t even matter any more

I think to myself, when I die will God say unto me ‘Well done thou good and faithful servant. Thou obtained a double doctorate and honors in all of your coursework. Enter into the joy of the Lord.”

Would He commend me for amassing wealth beyond measure and making a name for myself?

Or rejoice over all of the church events I planned, all the services I attended, and all of the “hard work” I put in at the expense of my mandated responsibilities?

Would he consider all the people I ignored on a day to day, relationships I forfeited, people I overlooked…all the grace and compassion that I withheld because I was too busy?

And lately I’ve been thinking of my son, young as he is. What will I teach him about value? If I were to loose him before his time, would I say ‘if only he had done better in school’ or ‘I wish I had disciplined him more’(which by the way happens most of the time because I refuse to pay attention to him and give him my undivided attention)? I think I would wish that I had spent more quality time with him, listened to him more, hugged and kissed him more, taught him intentionally, played leisurely with him—showed him that I love him!

Excuse me ya’ll; I’m going to go play cars with MM. His smiles and giggles definitely make it worthwhile and it is those memories that I will cherish even as I “lose” his childhood and innocence.

I welcome discussion.

-Lyrics by tia 2011

The Secret to Time Travel

Image courtesy of DrAjao @www.DrAjao.com

I sat in my mother’s room, contemplating life as I knew it. There was no money to pay my school fees but as a young girl, I had a burning desire to go to school. My parents were farmers and I played my part by helping to sell the goods. But I knew I wanted to do more. Even though I was a young, poor girl, I knew there was more to me. With time, my parents recognized my longings and against all odds, they found a way to send me to school. God even raised up some very key people to invest in me and make this a reality. With the bare minimum, I stayed focused and determined, and I did complete secondary school. And when my sister died as a teenager due to a preventable illness, I knew I had to make sure such senseless losses were eliminated in my town. So with trust and dependence on God who rose up people of destiny to support, I went on to complete medical school, and further, to build a hospital in that very same town…

The school bell rang as I returned to the present. Deciding what to do with ones life is a challenge and having highly successful parents doesn’t make it easier. Recounting a series of stories my mother shared with me about her childhood put me into her shoes; into her experience. I have so much more than she had, so many more opportunities; how will I choose to make a difference and impact my community? Even now, this blast to the past; so present and real, yet so ancient; stands to inspires me.

The secret to time travel became more real to me presently one afternoon as I was enjoying a refreshing afternoon nap. Making it through that last stretch before I had to get up and approach my evening, my toddler son climbed up onto the bed and commenced to tap me while calling ‘Mommy’ to get me up. In that instant—that space between reality and a dream—my mind whisked back to a similar afternoon many years ago. My mother had just heard the sad news of a loved ones passing and as she lay in her bed mourning tearfully, my 2 siblings and I, no more than 4 and 5 years old, climbed onto the bed and began to speak to Mommy in consoling words. “Mommy? Mommy? Don’t cry, Mommy…” In that instant almost 25 years later, though odd and surreal, I zipped through the past and I am dumbfounded that I am “Mommy” now.

Thus, in essence, the secret to time travel is investment into family relationships. Whether it’s dodging sharp stones as you walk shoeless for that “1-mile” to school or observing your “twin son” become as intrigued by the same classic superheros as you were as a child; and even as you roll that special family heirloom around your finger for another few moments…I urge you: invest in the family that makes these things special. Spend quality time with your little ones: children and god children; nieces and nephews and especially those grand kids. Our prayer is that they will outlive us in years and magnitudes of success. But also keep in mind that our predecessors may not always be around. Take time now to cherish our parents, our grand parents and the wise elderly. Their life and experience is invaluable and will teach us important lessons that will guide us through life and give us the ability to travel through time.

-Lyrics by tia 2011

One thing is needful...

Image courtesy of DrAjao @ www.DrAjao.com

One valuable lesson that I’ve learned as a public health professional in maternal and child health is that a child reaching his or her 1st birthday is a big deal. So you can imagine our zeal as my son and I have been celebrating 1st birthdays back to back every weekend now. With at least one, sometimes two or three celebrations to attend, we’ve had to plan our time wisely as a family. But it is such a joy to celebrate with families whose little ones have reached this milestone.

In fact, the first significant 1st birthday party I helped to celebrate in my adult life was that of my first nephew. Having rented a hall for the celebration, we got there early to arrange tables and chairs and to start the decorations. Several adults were there helping to prepare, and the birthday boy was present as well. As I diligently helped to set up tables and place centerpieces, I noticed that my husband was not helping. In fact, he was sitting down leisurely playing intently with the birthday boy! Obviously annoyed that he wasn’t pitching in, my intentions were to approach him to complain. However, before making those moves, I stopped to consider the scenario more closely.

There and then, it dawned on me that my husband had chosen the principle thing: his focus was on the most important entity in the room! We were there to celebrate my nephew on his 1st birthday, thus, all of the fan-fare, planned activities and logistics were really second-place to the reality that we have a happy, hearty and healthy child to celebrate.

This reminded me of the Biblical account of Mary and Martha when Jesus came to visit (Please read Luke 10:38-42). Martha was busy working, and serving, and preparing, while Mary sat lovingly at the feet of Jesus, taking in His enduring Word. As my husband laughed and played with the jolly toddler, I had to appreciate his choice to focus on the celebrant rather than on the celebration.

So in a way, this is a lesson to all of us adults: in all of the trivial activities and busy work we do, let’s not forget that relationship is what is important; spending quality time with our kids and letting them know of their special significance to us i.e. “being” for them rather than just “doing” for them. But of course, let my experience be another way for you to grasp what the Scripture is emphasizing in the Book of Luke.

I pray for the grace to spend each moment concentrating on what is needful.

-Lyrics by tia

September 29, 2011 5:45-6:12am

The Thing About Temptation

‘What am I going to do with this boy?,’ I think to myself as I scold him for the 15th time.

“MM leave those things alone!”

Sitting in the corner of the living room, which turns out to be his primary play area, is a large box of fragile items. The box sits in this particular corner because this space is the only area to conveniently put them. Somehow, I haven’t been able to convince my son to leave the items alone. After explanations, yellings and threats from all adults in the house, somehow he still ends up back in that corner picking up the delicate items to play with.

Funny: his giant toy box is at the other corner and he’s been totally ignores it!

DON’T DO IT! Why is that so hard to understand? Why won’t he obey? What is it with this disobedient child? Rather, he still ends up back there, doing the same thing over and over with a satisfied smile, oblivious of my disapproval even though I’ve reprimanded him several times before…

But isn’t that just like temptation?

It is ever present, always easy to access.

Can I really expect him to obey when the temptation sits squarely before him constantly?

The solution? The Bible says to FLEE. (See I Corinthians 6:18; I Corinthians 10:14; I Timothy 6:11, II Timothy 2:22)

Don’t make it easy!

Don’t keep it around!

Get rid of it with a quickness!

And you know, the amazing thing about it is that He will always make a way of escape for us.

I Corinthians 10:13: There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God [is] faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear [it].

I just found our way of escape while writing this: I moved the box to a little space on the other side of the baby gate.

Inconvenient and in the way, yes, but we will be the better for it.

-Lyrics by tia 2011

September 18, 2011 11:45am- 12:21pm

Little Voices of Reason

My husband and I were chatting about what does and does not call for punishment for the kids as we imagined them innocently getting into mischief. So we figured that kids often have logical reasoning for what they do that makes complete sense to them, and maybe if we take a moment to hear them out, we would understand, or at least, get a good laugh.

He recalled the time he took his Dad’s Rubik’s cube and removed the colored tiles in order to put them in the correct order. It made sense to him but of course, he faced consequences. Thinking about it now, it does make sense. What difference would it make if parents listened to those little voices of reason?

A trip down memory lane reveals similar stories from my childhood.

Like the time I just wanted to feed the ants outside the window. I positioned a new bottle of syrup through the window, meaning to provide the ants with a drizzle of sweetness when the top popped off, half the contents gushed out, and I dropped the new bottle, cracking the plastic.

I’m sure my mom would have understood if she had allowed me to explain.

And the time when I graciously assisted my parents in bringing in the laundry and by even making their bed. When I couldn’t figure out how to make the edges of the comforter lie neatly, I lined the edges of the bed with push pins in hopes that it would hold the comforter down and keep it from being so puffy. ‘Mom would be so proud of me’, I thought. Well, not quite, as when she took her normal position beside the bed to make calls, she was greeted by a painful, edgy surprise. Let's just say I didn't get the hug I expected.

And who can forget The Great Permanent Black Paint Spill of ’89. I would love to tell the whole story but to summarize: a can of black paint falls and spills; 4 kids attempt to clean…I end up playing Slip and Slide and decorating the walls with hand and butt prints, and the upstairs carpet with permanent foot prints.

Need I say more?

Actually, in this case, I had no other reasoning except that it was mighty fun! And I figured, if I was going to get in trouble anyway, I might as well go all out!

So, I think we ought to hear our kids out, get a laugh and be selective when it comes to punishment. Who knows, the story may cool your temper and give you a greater appreciation for your child’s fascinating nature.

Lyrics by tia 2011

Missing Child Alert!

Sunday evening, I was at a social event with my little family—dad, mom and toddler son. I decided to give my son a moment of freedom and in an instant, he disappeared from my sight amidst the crowd. When I realized he hadn’t thought to turn back and find ‘mommy’, I went after him. He was no where in sight! He couldn’t be far, I thought to myself, so I didn’t panic but I looked about with urgency. Still no where. Then I called his dad who joined the search. Next, I began to ask people around…no one noticed him. We kept our demeanor but searched all the more intently. What if he followed a stranger? What if he left the building and was wandering the streets? What if someone found him, planning to harm him? Or could someone be playing a cruel, cruel joke on me???:

Punked: Negligent mom punished!

As I moved about, all I could think of was how he could possibly be looking for me just as frantically; and the more I looked, the further away I would get from him. But giving all glory to God, I found him playing alone in a remote section of the building. Needless to say he spent a long time in time out (although I would have chosen to help him to a good spanking if it were convenient).

Sitting here tonight I consider the feelings I experienced during those 15 or so minutes, and I began to wonder how the Lord feels when I wander from Him…

We had such a close, intimate and tightly bonded relationship…wouldn’t you think I would have turned back to Him right away?

But still I wander.

And yet the Lord stands on with hope in His eyes.

She can’t go far; she’s my child. I paid for her with a special price—My precious Blood; she’s mine! But where did she go? What is she looking for? What if someone hurts her? What if she’s looking for me in all the wrong places?

For a clearer picture, I am reminded of the scripture in Revelations 2:2-5

2 I know your industry and activities, laborious toil and trouble, and your patient endurance, and how you cannot tolerate wicked [men] and have tested and critically appraised those who call [themselves] apostles (special messengers of Christ) and yet are not, and have found them to be impostors and liars.3 I know you are enduring patiently and are bearing up for My name’s sake, and you have not fainted or become exhausted or grown weary.4 But I have this [one charge to make] against you: that you have left (abandoned) the love that you had at first [you have deserted Me, your first love].5 Remember then from what heights you have fallen. Repent (change the inner man to meet God’s will) and do the works you did previously [when first you knew the Lord], or else I will visit you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you change your mind and repent. (Amplified version)

So I have a crucial role to play. He expects me to turn around and return to him…another word for ‘turn around’ is repent. And as any parent would know, nothing is better than a child running lovingly back into your arms. It sure beats having to snatching him/her up so you can discipline them.

-Lyrics by tia 2011

Your Mother's Instruction

My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother: Bind them continually upon thine heart, and tie them about thy neck. When thou goest, it shall lead thee; when thou sleepest, it shall keep thee; and when thou awakest, it shall talk with thee. For the commandment is a lamp; and the law is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life.
-Proverbs 6:20-23 KJV

My son, obey your father's commands, and don't neglect your mother's instruction. Keep their words always in your heart. Tie them around your neck. When you walk, their counsel will lead you. When you sleep, they will protect you. When you wake up, they will advise you. For their command is a lamp and their instruction a light; their corrective discipline is the way to life.
-Proverbs 6:20-23 NLT

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I couldn’t have been more than 11 years old when my mother told us to memorize this passage one day during summer vacation. She gave us the assignment before leaving for work that morning and expected us to know it by the time she returned in the evening. I liked the challenge so I took on the task willingly.

Funny how we forget.

As I lay in bed this morning, the words of this passage rehearsed in my heart. Odd; I hadn’t read it in years. But as I allowed myself to awaken to the truth of this Word, I realize that even though I’m grown and a parent myself, this Scripture is still meant for me.

Looking around I can sense why God chose to remind me. Being out of work now for over 6 months has messed with my morale. And rather than engaging in the glorious act of homemaking that I once coveted, I laze around all day in self pity and nothing gets done. I feel stuck and I am certainly not the person I know God intends for me to be.

My parents worked very hard to raise responsible children. They went out of their way to instill discipline and value into us and they are extremely industrious and determined people. Did all of their hard work go to waste? Or perhaps I ‘forsook the law of my mother’ (v.20.)

I’m going to have to make some changes.

So if you ever find yourself in a rut, consider what your father instructed and what your mother taught you. It will lead you, it will keep you and it guide you in the right direction.

-Lyrics by tia 7-6-11 8:30am-9:30am

Recommendations: Toddler Tunes

Sometimes I wish we hadn’t introduced our kids to the TV. I remember growing up and my father deciding to ban TV watching in the house. It worked wonders. But here I am in front of the TV with Johnny. As other young moms can attest to, the TV is constantly on kiddie channels and some how the programming grows on you. Scenario…

Your toddler’s favorite show comes on. “Lily, Jumping Jugs of Juice is on!” You hurry her away from her toys, eager not to miss the opening song. You bop together up and down to the song as you sing animatedly along. “Yaaaaay!” You and Lily clap along. As the show commences, you’re relieved that this is a new episode! You get comfortable on the sofa. You don’t even notice when Lily wanders back off to her toys. You don’t noticed, however, until she has made her way to the front of the tube, blocking your view. “Lily? Lily. Honey…don’t stand so close to the TV (code: move!). Then she dares to change the channel and presses the off button! You snatch her up and frantically try to figure out what she pressed. You’ve only missed a minute; you both continue the show.

There’s a knock on the door. The delivery guy. Now since you have DVR, you must have paused the program. Well, I don’t have DVR! What do you expect me to do?!?

Well, although The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children under 2 years old be not exposed to a lot of television, the recommendations do not include me. Maybe they should; the extra time and attention I could devote to my child otherwise will be worthwhile

-Lyrics by tia

April 25, 2011

Fast Girl

“Get in here”, your mom fumes as she drags you into the house.

“Sit down.” She paces the kitchen floor then faces you.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Her intensity leaves you scared and at full attention. (Imagine that your mom is Rochelle Rock from Everybody Hates Chris)

“Sex, my dear, is nothing to play with. Don’t you know that as African Americans we are at a disadvantage? Best know that in 2006, 13.35 out of 1000 of our live babies died before the age of 1; that’s twice as high as the national average! We actually have poor birth outcomes regardless of our income or social status. How do you explain that? Some base it on the whole life course theory. That means that what you do to your body today will affect your generations to come. Talk about the sins of our fathers! And with your hot self,” flicking your hair “you are at higher risk of having a low birth weight or premature child. Can you handle that?

If you think that you’re going to bring some little boy to my house talking about he’s your baby’s daddy, then you’ve got something else coming. Baby, sex is not the greatest feeling in the world: love and respect is! So the next time you feel the urge to chase boys all over the place, tell me!”

Unable to hold back the emotion any longer, she says “I love you baby. You’re all I’ve got and I want the best for you. Okay?”

Still wide eyed and terrified you nod as she heads out of the room. Before she leaves she picks up a bottle and tosses it through the air. You catch it. “And don’t forget your folic acid. It’s important for fetal neural development”.
She leaves the room.

You stand there stunned beyond imagination. I mean you were just playing girls chase boys with your 4th grade buddies from around the way. But you leave the kitchen with thoughts to ponder upon; thoughts that you carry on throughout your adolescence and young adulthood.

Recommendations: The Wonder of Reading

So experts say that reading is great for kids, and that we should start reading to them starting from the belly. So you decide to take your little boy, Johnny, to the library for some time in the books. You walk hand in hand to the kiddie section and flip through books. Through your right ear you hear another mommy gleefully sharing an exciting story with her child.

“The rat took the bat and told the snake to scat!...See the rat? It’s grey. And look at the snake: what color is it? The child answers “turquoise” Mom says that’s right honey. Good job…”

Some weird competitive feeling comes over you. You say ‘Honey, let’s go pick a book. As the imaginary envious parents watch you, you squat to your kid’s level and ask him affectionately,

“Honey, what do you want to read? Want to read about cars,” Picking up a book on the subject. “Or, or what about horses?!

Johnny takes the horse book from you…then reaches up to the shelf above him and knocks several books down. You say ‘Oh Johnny, you want to read all these books? Okay let’s read some and take some books out.”

Clever.

So you take him to a little table and you sit down placing him on your lap. You start to read the horse book together. It was quite nice actually. He would touch the pages and help you turn. Then all of a sudden he starts struggling and manages to get out of your grasp. You take off after him and once you catch him you say

‘Honey, you should have told me you needed to go to the bathroom. Let’s go.”

Ah, the potty trained trick. Good one.

So you go to the bathroom, check if he needs to be changed and head back out.

Johnny spots the play section where there are a bunch of blocks to play with. You go over and he’s fascinated with the blocks. You sit down and watch him.

‘He’s so cute and he’s learning so much’, you think as he knocks two blocks together. ‘And it’s so good to see him playing with other kids.’ You’ve almost got tears in your eyes.

Then Johnny throws a block. You say “Now, now honey, don’t throw”. You smile at the other parents around you. Then he runs his hands along the table scattering towers and arrangements. Clinched tear “Honey, play nice…” You look at another mom: “Kids these days.” The kids continue to play civilly for a while when Johnny grabs a block from another kid. When the kid tries to get it back, he pushes the kid down and mistakenly smacks another. “Okay honey, it’s time to go.” You pull him away as calmly as you can.

Don’t worry, keep it up. Johnny is going to be an avid reader and civil member of society—just not at 13 months!

Based on a true story :p

2011

Recommendations: Baby Talk

So experts say that you should talk to your baby all the time and that no age is too early. This is important in order to develop your child's social and communication skills. So like they say, you hold full conversations with your child.

Scenario.

You get home from work and Suzy crawls up to you. You’re so touched; you grab her up and lift her in the air as she laughs. “I’m so happy to see you too, Suzy. How was your day?”; you ask enthusiastically. You pause. “Really? Well, let me tell you about my day.” You place her in your lap. “So I went to the 7-11 this morning and the most amazing thing happened. I got the last smoked turkey, tomato and swiss cheese ready-made sandwich!” Suzy giggles through her teeth. “I know, honey, isn’t that exciting? I mean it made my whole day! But then on my way home, I got stuck in traffic.” Suzy gets distracted and starts to pull at your hair. You pull it out of her grasp. “Yeah, honey, I did feel like pulling out my hair; especially since the radio station kept repeating a bunch of dumb songs.” Tired of sitting, she struggles to get down, through your arms. You lift her up, back on your knee “That’s right, dear; I weaved my way through those cars down the emergency lane…But then the police saw me and pulled me over.” Agitated, Suzy starts to cry. “Honey, you are so in tune with my emotions!” You place your head in your palm as you pull out a $75 ticket. :/