Standing (The Test of Time)

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This Mother's Day, I would like to revisit a piece I wrote in February 2011. It is a tribute to someone that is special to me and to many, many other fine and phenomenal women out there. This is dedicated to that special woman who though she bore no child of her own, was mother to the masses; teaching, disciplining and loving young women during that critical time of adolescence. We love you. Rest in Peace till we meet again.

STANDING

It was a shock when my parent’s decided to ship me off to boarding school to begin middle school (which was referred to as junior secondary school in Nigeria). It was with heavy heart that I parted from friends and family. Worst of all, I was to go to a Catholic school and not cognizant of their ways, I felt I would be a sheep among wolves.

I remember the day that my aunt took me to the campus and presented me to the Principal as her newest student. She was a Reverend Sister. My aunt told me to kneel as is the culture, indicating respect. I would not budge. She asked me again. Like Daniel, with godly defiance, I mentally repeated: “I will not bow. I will not bow.” Then my aunt hit me and pushed me to my knees. Like in a joke I've heard, I determined that though I was kneeling, I was still standing strong in my heart.

I did my best to hold on to my godly principals. I remember singing a song based on Psalms 63:3 for the junior talent show while others shared their physical stats and shook their behinds to a popular song by Shina Peters. These shows were secretly organized by students since the principal had banned them.

Once the Principal, fed up with some extreme religious practices on campus, made a proclamation that all religious material be banished from campus.  I went to my classroom in tears because I had a daily devotional that I loved called Keys for Kids. I went up to her with tears streaming down my face and showed her the book, begging that she would not make me part from it. She took it from me and flipped through the pages. She said that it was fine. I smiled brightly and returned to my classroom practically skipping. I really, really miss those days of strong commitment to Christ; hunger for the Word of God; and pure desire to delight in His presence. If only I could return to that…

On the day that I received a letter from my mother stating that I was to return to the US to continue school, I was sad that I would be leaving the place that I had grown to love. Regardless, my aunt came to pick me up even before the semester had ended. But before I left, I approached the entrance of the principal’s office. When she beaconed me to come, I knelt down at the entrance on her dusty floor and tearfully crawled my way through the expanse of her office, up to her desk. She watched me with tender and understanding eyes. She placed her hand on my shoulder and prayed for me, wishing me the very best. Little did I know that I would truly never see her again in this life.

Rest in Peace, my dear Mother in Christ. I, and the masses of other phenomenal women that you raised, are truly grateful.

2/9/11

Let us all be mothers who make a lasting impact well beyond our lifetime...

March for Babies: March for Life

March for Babies in Baltimore was a fabulous and successful event. I spent the beginning part setting up and scouting out all of the many, many members of the nine historically African American fraternities and sororities also known as The Divine Nine. In my journalistic attempt to capture various representatives with my phone, I ended up breaking it, my only photo capturing device. :/ This circumstance then forced me to stop and begin to enjoy the experience of serving at the walk and being attentive to what exactly was going on.

I looked around and so many organizations were walking in support of babies! There were very few Baltimore Hospitals that weren't represented. I met members of 6 out of the 9 Divine Nine organizations. There were so many walkers of varying races and ages, and so many of us volunteers. All of the national and local sponsors were fabulous as well.

You see, March for Babies brings out many families, many professionals and many communities who understand the effect of prematurity and birth defects on babies they have cared for, babies they love and even on themselves. Whenever I serve with The March of Dimes, I keep in mind how small and premature I was as a newborn and I praise God for a healthy life.

I took a moment to meet a few of our walkers. I met Ms. B who has been walking faithfully since 1972. She does this for all babies, just because. I met a mother who has 4 healthy full-term children of her own but who also was a preemie herself and knows how important it is to support other families. I heard stories of victory like that of a large, vibrant family who walked for their little one, Baby K. Baby K went from being a very tiny neonate to becoming pretty, plump and happy. They come to March for Babies to rejoice.

But not every family is so fortunate. I served in the Mission Tent where we share with the public more about The Cause and give families who have had a loss an opportunity to honor their "little butterflies" as we symbolized them. I discovered that it was better not to ask many questions while families stopped by to pay tribute. I discovered that many could not share; they couldn't speak much of it because it still hurt. It still hurt really, really bad. I noticed one family that paid tribute to 4 "little butterflies" gone too soon. These families walk in honor of babies they love, hoping to make a difference for other families who suffer the way they do.

How selfless is that? I've come away feeling inspired. I feel more compelled to seek out opportunities for mother and infant care the more. And even while I was bustin' a move with the Zetas center-square (WOBBLE BABY!), I sensed a feeling of community, a sense that everyone--families, health professionals, Greeks, and so many others--are in it for the same reason: to March for Life.

Consider marching in your town: March for Babies

I like this culture of giving and serving. I like it a lot. Lord please make me a part!

PS: I hope to share more on my passion for mothers and babies through a March of Dimes and Zeta Phi Beta Sorority Incorporated affiliated program called The Stork's Nest. Stay tuned!

Lyrics by tia 042813

Shake it off!

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I have got a new motto! Yes, there it is, in the title.

Now it has nothing to do with the song, but I thought that if I were to think about how Mariah Carey sings it then I could do it with style!

Well, the motto idea kind of stemmed from a conversation with a bosom buddy. She was sharing how a very petty circumstance parted a life long friendship. I thought it was a shame. The little foxes; the petty things!

So all morning I had been contemplating the matter and I decided that I would teach the concept to my kids. While watching my sons in the nursery at church with the other wonderful tots, I called out to my one year old who had just gotten knocked down by 2 three year olds. 'Siah, shake it off!,' I said, encouraging him to get up and keep it moving, especially since the other tots meant no harm.

I should have realized that after my mini lesson I would have a test of my own. So I too encountered a situation during the day where I felt seriously slighted. Oh my goodness, I ruminated over it, over and over, going from extreme thoughts of hurt and dejection to feelings of retaliation. But Glory Be to God, those 3 words rung into my ears until they journeyed to the center of my heart.

Eventually I stood up, shook it off, flung the bad feelings in the trash and went about my activities as if nothing happened.

And do you know what my 3 year old said to me when we got home? He said: "Mommy, you saved the day!" I felt like bursting out in tears. He had no clue of what had just ensued.

Yes, I did do the right thing. Yes, it was very hard. But no, I will not ruin my relationships because of petty things. And yes, this is a lesson worth living.

So my motto and what I'm going to teach my kids:

♪ Shake it off!♫

-Lyrics by tia 2013
040713

Open Windows

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When God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window

-Sound of Music

Closed doors can be discouraging. Especially when the door closes to a place where we once found security.With new-found liberation we see several more doors ahead of us and we regain hope. But as we jiggle on the locks of each door...one by one...in succession, and they just don't open, we begin to wonder why.

For me these were the doors of opportunity...well, more like change. I was willing to change my ambitions and dreams for the doors that stood before me. I began to convince myself that I may be meant for causes that maybe I just overlooked before. For me, as long as the door stood there, I was the perfect candidate for each opening presented.

And so doors remained closed. I had a lot of questions for God yet I looked around me and realized that I had my health, my relationships were still intact, and I had the opportunity to sow into others in a way that I hadn't when specific doors were open.

God was working in the wood works for me. In the midst of a volunteer opportunity I had taken rather seriously, a window opened. As I looked up at the window, I began to wonder how wide the opening could really be. I mean, you know, it's just a window. Could it possibly be to me as a door could be?

Well, this window has opened wider than any door! Not only will I be providing professional services for a program that is near and dear to my heart, but they are sure not treating me like a volunteer! They've made me feel like a professional and that feeling of dignity allows me to raise my head higher. God has made it so that I will love my work and approach it with zeal.

Have doors closed for you? Are you tempted to change just to fit in to any door? Trust in God. He is faithful who called you. And don't underestimate that window. It may open up into great things.

I Thessalonians 5:24:  Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.

-Lyrics by tia 2013